Actually, CAN XL is just around the corner with up to 20 Mbps vs 10 Mbps of 10BaseT1S. The other difference is that CAN XL has a paylod of 2048 bytes and will have data link layer security from the get go. While 10BaseT1S has just a little bit over 1 kbytes and MACsec is still ery expansive.
That said, both technologies are just prototypes and expected availability is in about 3 years.
I'm not an expert on automotive systems specifically, but in general with silicon level stuff like this when used in small, highly integrated systems, just having a PHY isn't nearly enough. Really, you want it to come baked into all the MCUs and MPUs your particular vertical uses so you don't need to waste time making your board designers wire up more shit and you can use the vendor library for your MCU instead of writing more shit. Most automotive microcontrollers come ready to go with a full CAN interface including all the libraries and such that you'd want, as well as dev boards that pin it out to whatever connector so you don't need to waste a board spin cycle creating an EDU.
That said, both technologies are just prototypes and expected availability is in about 3 years.